He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
