he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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