I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
