so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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