its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
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