She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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