I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
