you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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