next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
