My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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