i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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