His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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