And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
now i know why i became what i already was.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Randomize
