shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
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