i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
