I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
