threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize