that's an acceptable place to lick
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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