was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Randomize
