he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
