I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
