awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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