quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize