K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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