the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
