how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
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