You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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