One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize