Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
