i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
