White coat. Heels.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize