Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
