sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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