A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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