So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Randomize
