theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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