What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize