Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
