"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
