Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
