My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Enjoy the penises
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
