He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
