chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
