Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
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