but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
