god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
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