1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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