Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
