C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
