Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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