did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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